If you have trust issues, raise your hands.

This is one of the best cookies I’ve ever had. I’m sure you’ve seen them on Instagram, from Levain Bakery in NYC. I’ve had these cookies on multiple different trips because they are just that good and I could never get tired of them.

Some things in life are great and you just don’t mind going back certain places and even enjoy it. Like to get these cookies. In fact, sometimes I go back for seconds of these.

But what about when something happens for a second time and it takes you back to an unhappy place?

Should you be expected to keep your composure?

This is a little post for people to understand where I’m coming from in terms of my trust issues. And why I feel we shouldn’t be expected to just give out trust. Mainly it’s Incase a specific person decides to read this blog like he has read others.

I’ve been burned a lot. Lied to a lot. Cheated on a lot. I continued to give out trust freely after these things until I met a specific man who did nothing but lie. I was 24. I found after him I could no longer trust people. But two years later I attempted.

Story time. My last ex, y’all know him, Greg. Good looking dude. But that’s literally all he had going for him looking back on it. So at the beginning of our relationship I asked him what he was doing for New Years. He told me he was going on a trip to Kansas City with a friend, Michelle. And as any self respecting woman, I was very uncomfortable with this. What man goes on a trip with just one female who is “just a friend”? That’s right. None. I’ve talked to many different people about this situation and they have all said the same thing. It’s inappropriate and definitely not ok.

As time passed he told me he wasn’t going on this trip because she decided she wasn’t going anymore, so neither was he. Not because it wasn’t appropriate.. 🙄 fine whatever he wasn’t going.

She then started making rude comments on photos of us so I kept asking who this girl was. He kept saying a friend. And I continued to question and he said she was no one he would be interested as she is fat and not attractive. Hey Michelle I hope you read this. Greg said a lot of bad things about you. Well finally one day, her petty ass decided to message me on facebook (since people can’t just allow you to be happy) saying to tell my boyfriend who she had been sleeping with for months and staying with him multiple times a week that she wanted her things back.

Ha. What? Just friends? JUST FRIENDS? Sounds like more than a friend to me. He finally admitted they had been sleeping together but wanted nothing real with her. So, if that’s the case wouldn’t that have made the trip with her inappropriate???? Yeah I thought So. It’s crazy to me the amount of times he lied to me about their relationship and then had the audacity to say after she told me that he “wanted” to tell me. Funny. I think if I wanted to do something I would. Save the bs. I decided he needed to block her because she wouldn’t leave me alone and then wouldn’t leave him alone. It’s sad how long it took him to finally block her. Probably like a week. Which is fishy to me. Kinda wish I knew the other side of the story here but alas, I don’t.

Here’s the kicker. I was ig stalking cause I was bored and came across her profile and saw a photo of Greg and his new gf or fling or whatever she is IN A PHOTO WITH MICHELLE. You have that little respect for this girl, Greg? Does she even know who Michelle is to you? Or does she not care? In that case, weird relationship.

That leads me to a horrible experience I had with Mr. B. Soooo, I didn’t really touch on what happened while we were out or the bad news. When we started dating I laid it all out that I get jealous and have trust issues from past relationships. He told he who everyone on his social media was and touched on one specific girl in general, who yes I already had looked at her Facebook (duh) and had reservations about. Well when we were out drinking I asked who he was going to Boston with since he hadn’t told me and he informed me it was the specific girl. Aw hell nah. He said the same things as greg like she’s huge, she’s fat, he would never be into her, she’s prettier in photos, etc. I literally had a flashback in the bar to being with Greg. It was horrible. And he says I should just trust him but he just doesn’t understand that this is starting out just like with Greg and that hurt. And he knew I was upset but didn’t even try to rectify it by offering to stay in a different hotel room. Not ok.

What’s worse? He says he gave me no reason not to trust. Well, that long story you just read about my ex, yeah, I told him about that. He didn’t once mention that he’d be going on a trip with another girl as well. And for me that’s enough to not trust. Because he should have said something then. I asked if he was ever going to tell me and he said yes, when he “felt like it.” Uh ok. Be a douche. Because that’s a lack of respect.

If there is any female who is ok with their boyfriend going on a trip with one single female and staying in the same room as them, please, by all means, let me know! Because I will tell you this, first of all, you’re nuts. It’s not appropriate. I don’t care who you are. And the majority of people agree. Clearly mr b and greg both had little respect for me in a relationship sense. I’m better off. I hope someday I’ll meet a man who is better.

But girls, just know your gut instinct about these things is real. Don’t ignore it. And if he wants to break up with you for having issues, please move on and realize you’re better off. No telling when you’d really get hurt. If you don’t feel you can just trust someone, then you probably can’t. But really who trusts right away anyway? I don’t.

I can say with one hundred percent certainty that going through that two relationships in a row was not fun. Idk where I find these winners but I think for now I’ll be on my own. I got things going on anyway.

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